Running a forum with someone... would you?

[Ashley]

I have been talking to a person through PM and he wants me to help him run a forum he plans on creating. Just now I asked him, you're not going to have me sign up and then just dump the project on my lap, are you? He did say that it was gonna be both me and him, but I'm a tad suspicious though. One minute I want to help, because I love helping people, but at the next minute, I'm afraid he's just gonna dump the whole works in my lap, and you all know what my reputation as a forum owner is like. What do you guys think I should do? Should I just play everything by ear and give it a shot? What would you do in my situation. Another thing, I have never co-owned a forum with anyone before, although I think that'll be better than running my own forum completely, because like I said, you guys know how I am as a forum owner in general, and I'd like to not go through that again. I think he said we were going with SMF. I'm gonna have to check that PM again. I'm kind of suspicious, but at the same time I want to try it as well. I'm hoping it goes well.

 

[Ashley]

Update: I have decided not to do it afterall. Here is the post:



http://forumpromotion.net/forum/viewtop ... 26&t=30295 I don't know why he even asked me if he was going to eventually make me do all the work in the end. I'm sorry, but I told him in PM that my answer for now is no. I have no intentions of running a forum again. Sorry I sounded scared in the FP post, but really, this is insane. You guys as well as they know what my repuatation is like as a forum owner, and turning the forum that I was supposed to help on over to me would be like, well, turning a paint brush over to someone who wasn't a painter! No thanks on this one.

 

[Nebulous]

You should run a forum with a someone you know.. Not some random person you have been PM'ing a few times.

 

[Ashley]

You should run a forum with a someone you know.. Not some random person you have been PM'ing a few times.

well, you're actually right. I mean, he joined up with a few of my own forums that I've had, but he never posted. And that's what I'm afraid is going to happen on his forum; he's just gonna sit there and lurk, and I'm going to be doing all the posting. Posting announcements, creating discussion topics, etc.etc. Now if it was, say, you or Princess who asked me to co-run a forum with you, then I would have gladly said yes, because I have known you guys for a year, and I have seen you around on various forums, and you guys are both seriously active posters. Now that's something I wouldn't mind.

 

[Princess]

Would I run a forum with someone--obviously the answer is yes......

But Nebulous is right--you should really know someone before you get into foruming with them.

 

[Ashley]

Would I run a forum with someone--obviously the answer is yes......

But Nebulous is right--you should really know someone before you get into foruming with them.

I think I figured you would, Princess

I would too, but I know this persons reputation, because like I say, he's joined up with a couple of forums that I used to have. And both the ones that I have had, he never even posted. I asked him why in PM, at my site, of course, and he says he doesn't like posting because people have complained about his posting before. So I'm sitting there thinking, why even join then if you think people are only going to complain? I know that sounds rude, but that did make me really suspicious, that's for sure.



I'm just thankful that I didn't accept his plea for help. If I had, I think I would've known how it would've turned out, so I'm glad I said no.

 

[Nebulous]

Ive seen many forums were someone promotes someone to admin and then that new admin takes over the forum and/or deletes everything, bans all the members, and shuts it down. <--- That is really bad when its on a free host and there is no backup to restore the mess.

 

[Peaceful]

I run Movie Discussions with someone. Seems to work pretty well.

 

[Raven]

I ran my forum for about 4 and a half years without help. but since switching hosts i've had to have someone to help with mods and updates etc. I have known him for about 5 years and enjoy working with him. I would never work with someone i didnt know though.

 

[Whatif]

What Nebulous said.

It's happened to me before.

 

[Ashley]

Well, I am now running a forum with someone, not the same person I told you about. It's going quite well. Kind of looking into getting a second co-administrator, though, as my regular one is still in school at the moment and can only be on certain times of the day. So can I, when it comes down to it, but at the same time, I just feel better knowing that I have help. This is my own forum, by the way.

 

[Tom]

I usually run a forum with a partner... It really has its pro's and its con's.

 

[Crys]

No. I've managed my place since 2014 by myself and I don't want to run anymore forums.

 

[DrLeftover]

Many Years Ago, on a BBS far far away.... I was a ranking staff member.

That ruined several good long term friendships, and, to be fair, created a few others.

Given thirty-odd years of hindsight, I'm not sure it was an equitable exchange.

Would I do it again? I have been approached by others who run boards/forums. The answer is always the same: "thank you, no. Been there, did that, would rather never do it again."

Then they say: "but it's on the Internet!"

I run three websites, one of which has been online since the mid-nineties, there's no mystery there any more, either.

 

[ZandraJoi]

Running a forum with another is similar to being in a relationship because this IS a relationship. You have to have the same ideals, goals for running the forum. Know what to expect from one another. Like each other as a human being. Most of all, Trust each other.
I've been running my forum for over 3 years & while I have had temporary Staff to help me fix a few problems, I've been on my own. The "If I got bigger, more active, would I want another Staff member?" Maybe for the tech side (if I ever got out of Proboards) but that too would be on a temporary, as-needed basis. I've seen too many friendships ruined by going from the stage of "just friends" to "being in a relationship".

 

[MrDawn]

I don't mind running forums with a partner. It's more fun that way then just doing it alone.

 

[~ True Legend ~]

Running a forum with another is similar to being in a relationship because this IS a relationship. You have to have the same ideals, goals for running the forum. Know what to expect from one another. Like each other as a human being. Most of all, Trust each other.
I've been running my forum for over 3 years & while I have had temporary Staff to help me fix a few problems, I've been on my own. The "If I got bigger, more active, would I want another Staff member?" Maybe for the tech side (if I ever got out of Proboards) but that too would be on a temporary, as-needed basis. I've seen too many friendships ruined by going from the stage of "just friends" to "being in a relationship".

I like the analogy of

going from the stage of "just friends" to "being in a relationship".

Nice play on the word partner

 

[Sinistra]

Running a forum with another is similar to being in a relationship because this IS a relationship. You have to have the same ideals, goals for running the forum. Know what to expect from one another. Like each other as a human being. Most of all, Trust each other.
I've been running my forum for over 3 years & while I have had temporary Staff to help me fix a few problems, I've been on my own. The "If I got bigger, more active, would I want another Staff member?" Maybe for the tech side (if I ever got out of Proboards) but that too would be on a temporary, as-needed basis. I've seen too many friendships ruined by going from the stage of "just friends" to "being in a relationship".

Valid point! my ex-wife was an admin at one of my communities. Claimed I cared more about the community than her and she deleted EVERYTHING! Me being the tech-savvy one in the relationship I had a Database backup! so the joke is on her! This is why I keep my forum life and personal life separate. I don't mind getting into a relationship with someone on Communities. whether they run it or I run it. I will decline to be admin on their site and I will not ask them to be admin on mine.

 

[~ True Legend ~]

Valid point! my ex-wife was an admin at one of my communities. Claimed I cared more about the community than her and she deleted EVERYTHING! Me being the tech-savvy one in the relationship I had a Database backup! so the joke is on her! This is why I keep my forum life and personal life separate. I don't mind getting into a relationship with someone on Communities. whether they run it or I run it. I will decline to be admin on their site and I will not ask them to be admin on mine.

Interesting insight.
Just as the saying goes never mix business with relationships.
Like a business can be someone’s lifeline, so can a forum community for some 🧐

🪙

 

[Mendalla]

You should run a forum with a someone you know.. Not some random person you have been PM'ing a few times.

This. When we started Wondercafe2, the trio who did the grunt work of starting it, me among them, had known each other on the original Wondercafe for several years and were all focussed on coming up with a good replacement for it.

That said, we had a falling out with another of the trio that comes back to haunt us on an almost annual basis (and is currently doing so right now) so even knowing your partners is no guarantee of a smooth time.

 

[Nebulous]

That said, we had a falling out with another of the trio that comes back to haunt us on an almost annual basis

Like a ghost?

What do they do during this haunting? Are they unpleasant?

 

[NeoMetallix]

I started out with a person who was there to help, like my number 2, but he didn't want to be on staff. He just wanted to be a part and help get people there. So I would, but not sure about just any forum it'd have to be something I cared about.

 

[MrDawn]

I started out with a person who was there to help, like my number 2, but he didn't want to be on staff. He just wanted to be a part and help get people there.

I've done that once or twice where I was just a silent partner. I was on staff though, but I was a member by appearance and had all admin controls.